Butterfly Kisses

So today marks my first day of the second month back on ADDYI!

As I left town Tuesday night, I left a card on my husband's pillow.  Guess what it was covered with?  BUTTERFLIES!!!  Symbolic for my "flutters" I get while on Addyi!

Last week he got a larger than life butterfly on his bathroom mirror.

Today, I texted him a picture of a bottle of his new favorite beer, NOONER.  My question was, NOONER or LATER??

She's baaacccckkkkkk!

Interestingly, I was asked yesterday what exactly was a "flutter" if it wasn't in my heart?  I was a bit caught off guard because I guess I assumed it was self explanatory.  But in case you are wondering, it is similar, I would imagine, to the feeling men get when they see a pretty girl and begin to get aroused.  There is definitely a rush of blood to my V and simultaneous subtle but real contractions which are involuntary.  Signaling that, hey, I'm in the mood!!

It is totally refreshing to have that sense of desire again, even if not everyday.  It's never been about every day or achieving a hyper sexual state.  It's ALWAYS been about getting back those flutters that I used to have years ago.  

No, they don't happen every day.
No, that's not the only thing I feel.
Yes, I have thoughts and daydreams again about being with my husband.
Yes, I have the desire again to journey out and leave him romantic and intimate reminders that hey, honey, I love you and I WANT you.

I officially want to want again, HALLELUJAH!!

5 years of struggling is now over and we're ON THE ROAD AGAIN!!  Destination Who Cares!!!

If you are still struggling and have not spoken with your doctor, please do.  It is critical that you speak honestly and frankly with your provider and NOT listen to all the garbage in the news.  Somewhere in between all the negativity (fear of the unknown) and the advocacy (experienced users) lies an opportunity for you!  But you will never know if you don't ask about HSDD, if you are a candidate for ADDYI and actually take it for a while.

Happy Endings are the bomb!!